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Reuse.

10/13/2014

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There's no shortage of gently-used items here in Bloomington. You may find them at Once Upon a Child or Goodwill, or you may find them at a sale held at a church or other community organization. Every weekend, you're sure to find a yard sale (i.e., garage sale, rummage sale, etc., depending on where you live). 

Recently at Bloomington Area Birth Services, I hosted a rummage sale, completely volunteering my time. Together with my community, we raised over $550 that went directly to BABS. I did not do this work alone! We had many families donate their gently used (and sometimes brand new with tags!) items to BABS. Without these donations, there would not have been any type of sale. I'm sure for some families it was a convenient way to declutter their home, knowing they could bring over their bags and boxes of items to BABS. But for all the families, they made a conscious decision to donate to BABS. There are so many worthwhile organizations in our town that take donations to give away to families in need, and certainly families could have sold their items on their own, pocketing any money from their sale. I've done both- donated items to Goodwill, for example, and sold items independently to make a few dollars or recoup money on something I've purchased but no longer use/need. 

I was really amazed how much we (speaking from an organization standpoint, as I am the Program Director at BABS) received in donations. Up until a couple hours before the sale, we had people still bringing in items. I was so thankful for how generous people were, as the sheer volume of items kept me busy at the check out THE ENTIRE TIME. Really, doors opened at 2pm and I looked at my clock and was amazed it was 3:15pm! Time really flew! 

I was so fortunate to have volunteers for the sorting and organizing before the sale. Having never held a yard sale before, I really did not know what I was "getting myself into." I was actually hesitant how much to advertise the sale in advance, not knowing what we'd receive or how much we'd have to sell. And due to space restrictions, I didn't actually begin accepting donations at BABS until just a few days prior. Now that the rummage sale is over, I have a better idea how to prepare for and host the sale to make it more efficient for everyone. 

But back to my volunteers, because these women were undeniably helpful. And truth be told, I could've done a better job recruiting and communicating with my volunteers. Regardless, my volunteers came in and gave of their time and energy to prepare for the sale. I am not kidding when I say we had hundreds, if not a thousand or more, of pieces of clothing to sort. Really. We had sizes ranging from newborn to juniors. And let me tell you, a garbage bag or plastic tote can hold A LOT of clothing. It took hours to go through boxes, bins and bags of clothing. 

Looking through the clothing, we would stop and comment, "this is so cute!", or "look at how small this is!", or even, "oh my gosh, my son had this exact sleeper!". As a mom, I understand the emotional pull to keep so many cute outfits my children wore or to hang onto something because of the memories it evokes. And yet we had SO MANY donations of clothing that were undoubtedly special to the donors. 

And finally, we had a great turn-out from our community. Again, having never hosted something like this before, I honestly had no idea whether we'd have many attendees. I really wasn't sure how to advertise well for the sale, and yet, we still had a great turn-out. Lesson learned, advertise early, advertise often, and include details for what you're selling.

As I sat at my table at check-out, I had the fortune to talk with and interact with all the folks that came to shop. Because many things cost $0.25, I did a lot of counting and multiplying and adding. And when someone would hand me their pile of clothes and learn it was $6, the look on their face was priceless. What started as a great way to raise money for BABS turned into a great way to support families. Simply walking in and shopping was a  fabulous way to support BABS, and I was thankful for that! And yet, we had so many families say, "keep the change" after they heard the total. Knowing that the sale was supporting families made me feel so happy, as did knowing that it gave families an opportunity to support BABS. Maybe writing a check to BABS is just not a possibility, and I get it. But I am so grateful, as is everyone at BABS, for that extra dollar or two. 

There are changes I'd make the next time I host a sale at BABS (yes, I think it's going to happen again, though I'm not sure when). But for now, I'm just reflecting on how generous out community is. This tells me that our community values Bloomington Area Birth Services, and this makes me proud. I'm ever so grateful to be part of an organization that goes above and beyond to support families. 
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It's all a blur.

10/3/2014

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When your baby is born, he will expect to be held. He will expect to be close to you or someone else that loves him very much. He will expect to be tended to, his needs met. He will show hunger cues, to which he will expect to be fed. You will notice your baby relaxing in your arms as he settles in, nourished and comforted. 

In the early days, when it feels like all you're doing is feeding, changing, and soothing (among other baby-related tasks). keep in mind that you and your baby are both learning. You're also not only healing from birth, but you're producing nourishing milk, and your hormones are shifting as you settle into your non-pregnant, lactating body. Throw on top of that lack of continuous sleep and it's no wonder the first few days (weeks, months) are all a blur. 

Be kind to yourself. Be kind to those with whom you live. Everyone is learning. Everyone is adjusting.

I like to encourage you to create a comfortable, peaceful environment as you approach your due date so that once your baby is born, you will find your space to be conducive to healing, growing and learning. You don't want to put it off for once your baby is here, as you may not feel like tending to those details. 

You may want to:
  • set aside clean bedding that someone can put on your bed for once your baby is born. Settling into a comfortable, clean bed can feel so nice. 
  • invest in body washes or soaps that you will want to use if you bring your baby in the bath with you; something without dyes or perfumes may be better for baby's sensitive skin. 
  • buy snacks and drinks that are yummy, healthy, and nourishing; you will want to have plenty of food and drinks on hand so that you aren't searching for something to eat when you're hungry. Some women say their appetite ramps up while they're breastfeeding, so be prepared that you may find yourself eating more than you were expecting.
  • prepare a comfortable place in your home where you can sit, nurse your baby and rest; I enjoyed setting up a station on the couch with a baby seat nearby where I could lay my sleeping baby. I kept my phone, charger and plenty of snacks and a water bottle nearby. Don't forget to turn your ringer off when you're resting! 
  • decide where and how you're going to document your baby's first few days (weeks, months); keeping a journal nearby where you can jot down a few sentences or keep a calendar nearby where you can jot down milestones or something you want to remember from the day. Once a month, I like adding my favorite pictures directly into a photo book online where I add text to document the month's happenings; at the end of the year I order it and we have all our favorite pictures in one place. 
  • keep non-essential baby gear out of the way; while you may have lots of baby gear and toys for your baby to use in the future, it may feel cluttered to have it all sitting around for months at a time before your baby is big enough to use it. The same goes for clothing and shoes that are too large. 
  • make a plan at the beginning of the day (or week) for how you're going to meet your various needs: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. Taking care of your whole self can help you function, particularly when you're feeling sleep-deprived and overwhelmed. 


There's no one right way to plan for your postpartum and your baby's early months, but it usually helps to do some prep work before he is born. Only you know what you may need and what brings you comfort and reassurance. 
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Cake.

10/2/2014

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We celebrated my daughter's first birthday in August 2007. I used a babyfood cookbook for ideas and guidance in feeding her solids, and in the book was a recipe for a raspberry cake. 

No joking, I was as excited for her first birthday party as I was for my wedding day. For me, it was a celebration of not only my daughter's first year, but it felt like such a HUGE milestone for me as her mother. 

We had lived in Vermont her first year, away from family, and this was really the first time that our entire family and good friends would be in one space to celebrate her existence. 

I don't recall if Pinterest existed at that point, but I really didn't fix my sight on anything elaborate, except for this cake. 

This cake. 

It was entirely from scratch. I whipped the cream and spent a couple hours preparing this cake. 

How did I feel that day, hosting over forty people at my in-law's home, creating a cake from scratch and did I mention, very NEWLY pregnant? 

I felt stressed out, tired and anxious. I begged someone to just watch Avery and take care of her while I prepared for the party. I honestly can't remember much of the party, besides that cake. 

And that's what makes me feel sad to this day. That fleeting moment, when we celebrated my daughter's first year, I only remember the cake. I don't recall much of my daughter's silliness, and I don't remember taking time to really connect with her and tell her how much I loved her and how grateful I was to be her mom. 

Instead, I remember that cake and the stress in preparing for the party. 

Since then, I've made the mistake one other time in hosting a large party and getting overwhelmed with the details. But I've really tried to be in the moment, enjoying my guests and my family during subsequent parties. I've put less pressure on the party and more emphasis on my child. 

While I still visit Pinterest, I honestly have no drive or desire to create our parties from scratch or to consume my energy with the small details. Perhaps if it brought me more joy or if it wasn't as stressful, I would tend to the details. But for now, while I'm parenting three young children and some days trying to keep my head above water, I'm just doing what I can do be in the moment. 
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    Amy Beck is a mother, wife, birth doula, and childbirth educator. She values prenatal education and preparation as families prepare to welcome their baby. 

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